Idol Burning by Rin Usami

Author:Rin Usami [Yoneda, Rin Usami, Asa]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

Time stopped in the infirmary. From the cool white bed, the sound of the bell and the hallway noise it set off, and the rustling of leaves outside all seemed to recede into the distance. I shifted my gaze away from the fine pattern of white and gray on the ceiling. My vision focused on the glint of the chrome curtain rail, and then blurred again. My head was foggy, perhaps because I’d lost a lot of weight over the summer, and having started the new term while my rhythm was still thrown off, I couldn’t keep up. Red spots like clumps of blood showed up on the right-hand edge of my field of view, and zits erupted all over my face. Mom said the zits were disgusting. Online advice said to wash gently and moisturize, but I didn’t have time for that. Instead, I washed my face multiple times a day and grew out my hair to hide my face. It felt like a permanent version of the dizziness I got after staying too long in the bath, and I hadn’t finished my homework and I’d forgotten my Classics handout, and my ears hurt from my earbuds because I had to listen to my oshi’s a cappella lullaby all night to get some sleep. I spent most of my classes facedown on my desk, but in fourth-period English I had to get up for a group translation activity. The classroom was gloomy from the rain clouds hanging overhead, and maybe I imagined it, but no one seemed to be saying much. Still looking down, I picked my desk up and started moving. Clusters formed naturally and then readjusted, and at the end I was the only one left standing, elbows extended, desk hanging off my arms. My skin gathered heat, and I thought of the lines of sight tangling around every motion I made to look at the faces surrounding me and froze. The seconds ticking past added up inside my rib cage.

My body looped back and replayed that feeling from just a few hours earlier, and I curled into myself. I was on the verge of dissolving into sleep when the nurse moved the curtain slightly and said, “Hi, Akari? Mr. Arishima wants to have a word.” I sat up. My guts, which had shifted while I’d lain on my side, lurched uncertainly. My homeroom teacher was waiting in the back. In the infirmary, all the teachers seemed different from when they were in the classroom or the teachers’ room.

“What’s the matter, Akari?” he said, sounding teasing, or bemused. He was probably in his late thirties and hardly moved his mouth when he talked. His voice was quiet for the classroom but fitting for the infirmary. I followed him into the student consultation room at the back, which was there to protect students’ privacy. We’d barely sat down when he said, “I’m hearing from a lot of teachers you’ve been missing class.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Tired?”

“Yeah.”

“What from?”

“Um, just because.”

He raised his eyebrows deliberately, making an expression that said, Oh dear.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.